Cooter Balls (formerly Sweetbob) (sweetbob) wrote,
Cooter Balls (formerly Sweetbob)
sweetbob

I've been doing a lot of thinking....

It's been almost 10 years since I've had this livejournal....man, I can't believe that I've had it for that long. I know that I haven't updated this very often the last five years or so, but I have been doing a lot of writing in other places.

I'm starting to re-think my potential writing career...I just don't know if I have it in me. I feel like it has kept me from experienced a lot of things in my life. Shouldn't one of the joys of writing be writing about your experiences? I sit in my office, talk to other authors (most whom I've never met in person), and talk about sports/music/pop culture like what I'm writing even matters. 99% of the words that I write probably aren't even registered as a full thought. People skim through blogs/articles like they have something really important to get to and in actuality, they are just sitting at a Starbucks, drinking a skim latte to fit in with the masses. I have been re-evaluating a lot of things in my life and I feel like I'm going in circles. Who the fuck am I? Why should people read anything that I write? Why does my opinion or insight matter on any subject matter to anyone other than myself? I think a writer has to find humility before he finds success. I found that long time ago and I might be cutting myself short, hell I'm writing this in my livejournal that only a few people even read. If I had complete self-confidence and a reckless attitude, I would post this very paragraph in every medium that I write for...that would be a fun idea.

I guess I thought that I would get my "big break" by now...I have some opportunities on the horizon and even a podcast in the works, but nothing big. I read people who are in mainstream media or a well-recognized blogs/papers and their writing has such a sense of entitlement attached to them. I read them, get halfway through and I am just disgusted. At first I thought it was jealous making me view these people as snobs, but I know that it's not that. For example, why should I care who *fill in the blank* thinks is the best baseball player of all time? The author is in his early 20s and I have baseball cards other than he is. He might be knowledgeable on the subject, but it usually comes off as "this is the way it is because I said so" idea which is getting old. I believe that it is a sense of entitlement that young adults have because they started a blog, built a following by posting pictures of celebrities in bikinis with some sports information attached to the viewing material. Anyone can start a blog and there are ways to pad the traffic and sometimes that sense of entitlement and naivety is so loud that what the author is writing might as well be put on mute.

I'm glad that I got that off my chest. So, how has everyone's weekend been so far?
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